Big decisions

"I love that the biggest decision of my day is which direction to walk on the beach."

I heard this line 10 years ago sitting in a first year social work class. My professor, a woman in her 60's with the energy of a teenager, was talking about self care. She was explaining its importance and how her biggest method is retreating to a beach every year where nobody else is around. Peaceful solitude.

The line resonated with me and continues to do so. As someone who is usually quite busy and with multiple ongoing commitments this seems like a dream scenario. Just decide which way to walk. Since landing in New Zealand I've been traveling 100% solo and so have had no schedule to adhere to or commitments to hold. The other day I was in a small tourist town called whitianga. I had intentions of going to a place called cathedral cove on a neighboring beach. When I woke up in the morning the weather was not going to cooperate and not going to make a beach day much fun. I thought of alternatives but in a beach town with a small population when the weather doesn't cooperate your options reduce drastically. I found myself thinking about potential ways to spend my days, but after examining logical possibilities I found myself with an unexpected question "which direction would I like to walk?"

I headed east. I decided to hike an old historical site which also acts as a viewpoint and nature reserve. Midway through my walk it hit me. I had a sudden wave of peacefullness that would be hard to describe. I tried to think back to when I had felt like this before and couldn't recall a time. It wasn't that I was overly jovial, I was simply at peace. I had my moment where what direction to walk became my biggest question of the day. I think that the moment I realized it I probably had a huge grin on my face. I spent the next 3 hours slowly strolling through the coastal forest of new Zealand absorbing the beautiful nature around me. It was wonderful.

I have slowly been able to feel the honey moon phases of the trip dissipate and it's a far cry from every single moment of every day being amazing, but unexpected moments of contentment sure are wonderful, especially when they resonate back into your past of a phrase and a time that fuelled imagination.