douche bags

normally I talk about weird or quirky things that I find interesting. today the topics is douchebags and how to identify them:

1) a douchebag is pretty much anyone drinking energy drinks earlier than 10pm. drinking a "monster" or a "rockstar" looks ridiculous and douchey. if you need to wake up in the morning drink a coffee like everyone else.

2) a douche bag is a guy who has a huge truck for no real reason and when sees someone on a scooter (such as myself) suddenly thinks they need to challenge me. I'm not challenging you........ I'm on a SCOOTER! these morons don't realize that they're morons because not only do they accelerate only to break right away but also make sure to give me this look through their sunglasses to make sure I notice. what exactly is trying to be proven is beyond me. luckily I have a way of combating this particular breed of douche and that is by zipping right by them when they stop at a light. they are waiting to turn right at a red and I just zip to the front of the line and I'm gone. sometimes when they catch up I give them a little look to see if they are still challenging me, the eyes are suddenly on the road again.

3) sweat/track pants plus designer shirts. 'nuff said.

4) pretty much anyone with a chin strap, barbed wire tattoo, or any sort of chinese text tattoo. If you can't see the tattoo its probably under a "tapout" shirt.

and that's how to identify a douche bag!